I am official. I've always known I was crazy, but now it's official. I have an official diagnosis of anxiety disorder, agoraphobia, situational stress disorder, situational muteness, and more. On the positive note, I get my service dog. On the negative note, I'm certified.
I have a way of projecting my feelings - especially if they are strong. I'm not sure how I do it, but I have managed to do it in the past. I guess these last few days I have been doing it again. I'm projecting sad. People around me are feeling it. I feel it. I see it.
It's not as if my marriage is bad, because it is anything but. I have a wonderful marriage. I am still happier than I have ever been in my marriage. I still love my husband completely and he me. It's a good marriage. We communicate. We listen. We love. We laugh. I cry. We are passionate. We are silly. We are good together. I am better with him than I have ever been with any other. I am faithful. I am stronger when he is by my side.
My thoughts are jumbled. I can't focus on any one thing. But I am ok. I am.
"It's not a smile, it's a lid on a scream."