Wednesday, April 27, 2005

BRACE FACE

Well, it’s official. My son is a “Brace Face”. His words, not mine. He calls himself that – I think as a defensive mechanism – so that he will be the first to do the name calling, and not be hurt by anyone else calling him that. We’ve had a few rough days of it, but things are finally starting to be better. Hubby comes home from MT today, so since he’s been gone, I’ve had to deal with all this fun by myself. I am really feeling like a single parent again… and want to know a secret… I don’t like being a single parent. I’ve come to believe that I can do it. Another secret is that I wasn’t sure if I could do it… but I can. I just don’t like it. I don’t like being the only one to make all the decisions. I don’t like being completely responsible for everything. I can do it… and that alone is a huge step for me to realize, but I still don’t like it.

Hubby has been in MT for 10 days now. I wasn’t very nice to him a couple of times on the phone. I told him he could stay there if he was going to take an attitude with me. I know, I should not have said that, but I didn’t like his attitude. I’m sure he didn’t like mine much either. He misses us, and kiddo is making me crazy because he misses his daddy so much… so I’m hoping that things will smooth out when he gets home.

Kiddo got to go to a fun park – similar to Six Flags, but not as big - last weekend. He had a ball. He really enjoyed himself. He went with the church. He rode with the pastor on his first upside down roller coaster. I was so proud of him. (He normally doesn’t like things that go upside down.)

I guess that is all. Life just is… not bad, not fabulous… just kind of puttering along. I’m grateful that it is as it is – not bad… I’ll handle this a lot easier.

Until next time…
M

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